Lunar Python's Life of Borgan


Scene: A small hut in the Katarina Zone

Three priests of Althena enter a small house in an alley of the holy city. A ratbag of a woman looks over a baby crib. She shrieks as they enter.

Mama Borgan: Who are you?

Priest #1: We are three priests.

Priest# 2: We are astrologers. We have come from Pentagulia.

Mama Borgan: Is this some kind of joke?

Priest #1: We have come to see the infant.

Priest #2: We must pay homage to him.

Mama Borgan: Homage??? You're drunk! It's disgusting! Out! Out!

Priest #3: No, no.

Mama Borgan: Comin' in here, first thing in the morning with some tale about Pentagulian fortune tellers. Get out! Go praise someone else's brat!

Priest #1: We were lead by a star.

Mama Borgan: A bottle, more like. Out!

Priest #2: We must see him. We've brought presents.

Mama Borgan: Out!

Priest #3: Cookies, donuts, canolis....

Mama Borgan: Well why didn't you say so? Well, c'mon in, he's over here. What is a canoli, anyway?

Priest #3: An Italian desert.

Mama Borgan: Oh, I see. So you're astrologers, eh? What sign is he?

Priest #2: Capricorn.

Mama Borgan: Capricorn, eh? What are they like?

Priest #2: He is one of The Four Heroes of Zophar, our true savior.

Priest #1: Ruler of Neo-Vane.

Mama Borgan: So that's Capricorn, is it?

Priest #1: No, no, just him.

Mama Borgan: Oh, I was going to say, otherwise there'd be a lot of them.

(The priests get on their knees)

Priest #1: By what name are you calling him?

(Dramatic Music)

Mama Borgan: Borgan.

(The priests mumble some prayers)

Mama Borgan: Do you do a lot of this, then?

Priest #1: This what?

Mama Borgan: This praising.

Prests: No, no, no.

Mama Borgan: Oh! Well if you're ever in the neighborhood again, do pop in. (The PRIESTS rise.) And thanks a lot ofr the cookies and donuts, but...don't bother about the canolis next time. Thank you...goodbye. (To BORGAN) Well, weren't they nice? Out of their bloody minds, but still...

TO BE CONTINUED (If anyone's interested)

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