(In the village of Burg on Caldor Isle lives a boy. This boy dreams that one day, he will become a Dragonmaster, just like his 6th cousin's grandfather's best friend's nephew.)
Alex: But Dad, I wanna become a Dragonmaster! I can't tend the crops this year!
Noah: That's nonsense, son! Becoming a Dragonmaster is nothing but trouble. You're much better off staying around here. Now, go clean the latrines.
(In the distant land of the Frontier, a girl is held captive by the evil warlord Garth Wayner. He is a murderer of the innocent, a practicer of black magic, and a stepper on of Sand Castles)
Garth: You will tell me who the goddess is or I will destroy you.
Luna: I know nutting!
Garth: Come now. I know you had a vision. You have seen Althena reborn among us.
(Luna, summoning the last of her strength, sends a telepathic message in the form of a dream across the world...)
Luna:
(Exhausted, she faints)
Garth: Not again! Augh. New strategy; we kidnap all the girls who could *possibly* be Althena!
Vile Tribe Member: Are you sure that's a good idea? I mean, one girl may not be missed, but, hundreds of young girls?
Garth: I find your lack of faith disturbing. Now go clean the latrines.
(Back on the remote Caldor Isle, night has fallen. Alex sleeps, but that sleep is soon interupted by a dream unlike any he had experienced)
Dream: Help me, OweMeOne Cannoli...
Alex: Ahh!! What was that all about? Hmm... "Cannoli"? I wonder if he's a a relative of old "Dyne On Cannoli"? I'd better go see him.
(The next day, Alex prepares for the journey to see Dyne)
Ramus: Hey Alex! Where are you going today?
Alex: I'm off to visit that crazy old hermit in the Woods, named Dyne.
Ramus: Really? Well, Master Alex, I'll accompany you. I am fluent in over 6 million dishes, after all.
Alex: So? How does that help?
Ramus: It doesn't, I just like to brag about it.
Nall: Don't forget me, I'm coming along too! (Bumps into Ramus) Outta the way, Man of la Munchies!
Ramus: How rude!
(Alex, Ramus, and Nall enter the Weird Woods)
Nall: This place is spooky. Where's this Hermit, anyway?
Dyne: Right here.
(Dyne steps out of the shadows)
Alex: There you are, Dyne On Cannoli! Say, you don't know a fellow by the name of "OweMeOne Cannoli", do you?
Dyne: Now, that is a name I have not heard in at least... 10 minutes. For you see, he is me.
(Inside Dyne's home...)
Alex: He is?! I mean, you are? Did you have a strange dream last night?
Dyne: Actually, I was awake all night watching Odd Couple Reruns.
Nall: Hey, the light on your answering machine is blinking!
Dyne: Really? Hmm... I wonder.
(Dyne plays the message)
Luna: OweMeOne, pick up! I know you're there. C'mon, pick up the phone! I'm in big trouble, being held captive by a madman in the Frontier! I only get one phone call, you idiot! Help me OweMeOne Cannoli, you're my only hope!"
Dyne: Well. It would appear we have a situation here, wouldn't it?
Alex: We must go to the Frontier and save her! It's what a Dragonmaster would do!
Ramus: Oh dear, Master Alex, that sounds very dangerous.
Nall: Ha, you big coward! And I emphasize "big"...
Dyne: If we're gonna go, we might as well get going! C'mon, let's head for Saith. We should be able to get a boat to the Mainland there.
Alex: But I have to ask my parent's permission, first...
Dyne: Hahahaha! And you expect to become a Dragonmaster someday? Okay, we'll go to Burg, then Saith. Well, hurry up! I expect to be back here in time for dinner!
Ramus: Dinner?
(The party heads for Burg, unaware of the terrible sight that awaits them....)