Tsar Wars

(Our heroes return to Burg... and then...)

Alex: Dekemberfest!!! Ahh!!!

Narrator: Yes, Dekemberfest. The time of the year when all the fowl smelling grog swillers come out of the darkness and toss back a few... hundred.

Drunk: Hay, dood! *hick!* Didja know theys haven Dekembafest in Saith now, too?

Nall: Oh really? Well, thank you for that bit of useless information, Mr. Bum, sir.

(The group splits up, Alex and Nall heading for the Partycrasher residence)

Noah: You want to go WHERE?! Saith?!?

Alex: Umm.. it's just an.. uh, errand. Yeah. I'll be back soon enough.

Noah: Well, alright.

(Alex meets the rest of the group at the entrance to town)

Ramus: Master Alex, are you ready to go?

Alex: Yep.

Dyne: Finally!

Nall: What are you complaining about? You just stand around doing nothing all day, anyway!

Dyne: True...

(The party reaches Saith. They enter the bar, looking for a captain to take them to the mainland. This should be quite simple during the current holiday)

Kyle: So, you want to cross over, eh? It'll cost you. 10,000 silver!

Alex: 10,000! We could buy our own boat for that much!

Kyle: But who's gone smash it into the land... I mean, sail it, kid?

Alex: I'm not such a bad sailor, myself.

Nall: Uh, Alex, when have you ever done any sailing?

Alex: Quiet!

Kyle: Hey you, fuzzball! You look familiar.

Nall: Well duh! I was originally cast in the role of the monster cookie, "Chewy-ing Gum".

Kyle: Oh, right! That would be him, now...

(Kyle points to the Albino Baboon next to him)

Baboon: Yes, I do have a speech impediment! So sue me!

Dyne: (shakes his head) Oy, budget cuts... Okay pal. We'll give you 2,000 silver right now... and another 15,000 once we reach the Mainland.

Kyle: Great! Deal!

(enter Borgan)

Borgan: Gwahahahaha! Ah, Solo! Do you have my Snack Cakes yet?

Kyle: I'll have 'em by tommorrow, okay "man"?

Borgan: You'd better... or things could get messy. If there's one thing we elephant blobs know, it's messy.

(Borgan exits)

Ramus: Oh dear, what an unpleasant fellow he is! I bet he won't even share those cakes with me!

Dyne: Alright, let's get going.

(The now rather large group of Alex, Dyne, Ramus, Nall, Kyle, and the "cookie" walk toward the ship)

Nall: *THIS* is the ship!?

Kyle: There's nothing wrong with my ship!

(Kyle takes out a roll of duct tape and covers up a few holes in the hull)

Kyle: Good as new!

(The ship drifts out to sea, heading for the mainland.)

Narrator: What awaits our heroes at their destination? Not more party members, I hope.

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